Suicide can be a touchy subject in the Christian world at large. Accepting that fact, it is with some trepidation I offer this article. This was my experience in losing a friend; this is my belief concerning the outcome of such a horrendous happening. Please read with the intent to consume the story and not to judge my personal convictions. It is my intent to bless and perhaps, help.
My dear "S,"
I will call you Sparrow. You are a sparrow with a wounded wing. For a while, you shared your life with us, and we learned that you had more than a finite mind. You were kind, graceful, and God had blessed you with soft beauty, but we (your friends) came to understand there was a relentless need buried deep within you. Sparrow, your intellect was superior, though your spirit was fragile like tissue paper, prone to tear so easily, but God kept you under His wing and sheltered you.
I sometime think you were that sparrow David, in his distress, spoke of in the Psalms, "I watched, and I am as a sparrow alone upon a rooftop." Oh, if you could have dwelt more on God's promising words "Two sparrows are worth only a penny, yet your Father knows when any one of them falls you are worth more than sparrows." He proved himself over and over. Did you forget?
Sparrow, you had soared the heavens in life's short moments, and rode the high currents of love. A full life and your chosen path were dashed to the ground by the chance of an ill wind, and a hardened heart. At times, hope would faintly stir, and we would see you rise and take flight again. Even so, you were passionate for a world that no longer was, or never had been; this concept robbed your joy, and shredded your inner being causing inconsolable grief. One day Sparrow, you flew with your broken spirit into a cage of your own making; in your heart, you thought this was escape.
Our Holy Bible says nothing can separate us (not even ourselves) from the one in whom we place our trust. Sparrow you had shown by your words and actions that you knew and loved your savior. We watched as you searched the scriptures and learned from them, but your grip slipped and the excruciating heartache, fear, and scrambled emotions caught up and overtook you like a wrathful storm.
Nothing that you did can cause your Savior not to love you, and now that love will be expressed face to face. You, Sparrow chose the timing but in His forgiveness, He will give you the eternal comfort you have longed for all your life. The battle between your mind and emotions, your belief and your fear is over. Now be at ease in His presence, you are free to fly.
Rest well sweet Sparrow, "S."
Rest well sweet Sparrow, S.